Blog the Third
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, females and males.. and everyone else I
haven't mentioned, get ready for... A BRAND NEW BLOG! That's right, for just 3
payments of $19. 95*, you can get a suscription to Hayden's Blog ABSOLUTELY FREE!
And if you blog now, you can get a sneak peek at the script of," TWILIGHT: THE
MOVIE: IN IMAX: IN 3-D! "
* No actual money required
181 comments:
Let me be the first to make this comment on this blog to get the conversation going. One can throw a banana from the top of a mountain, and it will fall.
Two blogs... 159 comments long... landmark comments... nay, legends... and now... it's back... in it's third season... are you ready for...
BLOG THE THIRDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!
Oh yes, yes, yesyesyesyesssssss! Can you believe it? It's here! After the terrible tragedy with Summer Blog( may he rest in peace) we have finally come back with a brand new format! Remember when we had that wierd verification thing? You know...rifghdfg...alsiyothb...
quysttubbxz...sldktoonmflycoxvtuydfglbkaasdlfjgoiepcvncmvodjngsrtpoaiagnaklgglfuykvlfddfhsdapsdrinqwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnmz... tl...
What's the ponit, or point, as America seems to favor in terms of wording, of this little exercise?
What computer hacker is gonna go,"Okay, I got the email address, I got the password... wait... What is THIS? Anasackot? What is this? I can't spell this! WHAT CAN I DO? Let's try... anasophi-NO! Awerft-NO!!!Attr-NO!!!!!It's not worth it."
Its stupid. Yes this blog is new, improved, and better than ever. And, pay no attention to the man brhind the r2. He's a harmless man.
Unless you play badmitton with him.
Congrats on your new blog, Hayden! i was in the middle of filming my movie when the director, like, screamed, " CUT! Hayden has a new blog!" And the whole cast erupted in cheers. Man, we've been cheering you on from the start, from the trip to Hawaii to your recent endeavors. You rock man.
I finally worked up the courage to blog, and man was it worth it. I mean it, this new format you got here... excellent! Sorry about Summer Blog, by the way. Anyone who has not read those last thrilling moments of that blog, your life must be dumb. I know that everyone I know and don't know has heard of your blog in Hollywood, and I hear Steven Spielberg wants to make a movie(joking). But man, congratulation and keep doing what your doing. This blog is gonna ROCK!
Skadoosh!
Mr.J Black
Dear Hayden,
Thank you for a beautiful place that my wife and I can come to, to get away from the horrors of vampirism. We have a hard life, and I thank you for an oasis of laughter and love that rejuvinates me. In fact, if I read your blog everyday, I don't have to indulge in blood. It is a remedy to my life,and I feel nearly human. This blog is a place that should never go away, and stay for all eternity. Of course, silly me. I forget you are mrtal. This earth does not hold you in the tight grip it does me. But with this blog, I feel free, like a bird, soaring above the world, a dove, free from all darkness. Your blog sings to me.
I am now attending Vampire Annonymous, and many others share my feeling that the easiest way to leave this behind is to read your blog. And so the lion sat down at the computer... I thank you, and may your blog flourish and prosper in the days ahead.
Sincerely,
Edward C.
RIP, Summer Blog. Yes, I attended your funeral and witnessed your parting words, and as a symbol of my parting sorrow I remained silent, to make things just a bit easier. Hayden wasn't the only one who loved you, you know. Viva la blog de verano.
WHAT UP, EDWARD? Mrs. Duncan loves you, you know.
Pity the poor creatures who didn't witness Blog the Great's parting words.
...
You can't keep a good blog down! No, you can't keep a good blog down!
Blog three, off to a great start. ;-) Hayden, it's so nice to see your fan base is still loyal. It's very entertaining to read the oh so clever comments- including the deep, profound statement from r2. Like father, like son. Creative, intelligent, and plain old goofy! All 3 are excellent qualities in men as far as I’m concerned. Speaking of men... I'm looking forward to seeing the pictures from your man weekend.
Now that you're men, you have facial hair...
;-) Hayden, great job on your Trout interview. She told me that she really enjoyed it- and she would like a copy as soon as we have the final edit. Did she give you any jpg that we can use? Let me know.
Okay- time to read.
Love you Allie- and I MISS you so much. xoxoxoxo
Thanks for putting in a good word for me with Edward. ;-)
Hey people who are totally not cooler than me. What the heck? Who is Edward C.? Some bloodsucking maniac who finds refuge on a blog? Man, the internet has runied all kinds of cra- wait, HAYDEN'S BLOG? Oh, no disrespect sir, none at all, I'll have that DNA evidence by five sir... Wow, dude, you're blog is, like, second to only my sbemails at homestarrunner.com. If you guys haven't check that out yet, I strongly urge aka FORCE WITHOUT YOUR WILL to copy and pasta-paste this link,
http://www.homestarrunner.com/
sbemail.html
It's an email show where we pick a random email, and I answer it. Usually with embaressing results. And humorous. Results. Humorous results. So, you must watch it.
But, of course, I love this little blog as much as I love my little Lappy computer. And, uh, by no means is this blog little, it's, uh, colossal, ginormous, uh, largeaphobicness... I'm out. But, check out my sbemails, and I'll check them for you. Wow. That could be a little-big ditty.
Check out my sbemails,
And I'll keep-a checkin' for you...
The best person ever,
S. Bad
Hayden, who are these people? Do you know? Let me know as soon as you read this.
Thanx QT- Mrs. D.
;) Oh, Mrs. Duncan.
I know, I really want to get together with you guys. OOOOH, is Academy Voices going to be at the Arts Festival next Saturday? Because I'm going to try to show up just to see if I recognize anyone.
Whoa, Strong Bad from homestarrunner.com blogged on my BLOG? You guys better check out the link. You don't mess with the Strongest of the Bad. Here's another link, that gives you a little info on Strong Bad.
http://homestarrunner.com/vcr_sb.
html
Here's one more, so you get who Homestar is.
http://homestarrunner.com/vcr_hs.
html
And, one more for good measure
http://homestarrunner.com/firsttime.html
Strong Bad(n.)a character from a website that is enormously funny and creative, who has an email show on the website. Matt Stewart is doing a segment on the website for KWN.
Mr J Black(n.) Also know as Jack Black, HE IS A HILARIOUS ACTOR WHO YOU KNOW OR ELSE. Films include Nacho Libre, Kung Fu Panda, and School of Rock.
Edward C.(n.) DUH.
Does that help, Mrs. Duncan? Ehh? You are exempt from these link checking outages. Those are just for us spry and footloose and fancy free young ones. Not that you're not young. I'm gonna stop.
No pictures from me of my MEN'S ADVANCE, it is called, Duncan family, not a man weekend. No pivtures for you, Duncan teacher. Of corse, I have none, but if I did, you'd better give me something of worth, like a signed copy of Inkdeath, or Brisngr. Or the tenth Pendragon book... can you do that? New craving, newww craving.... try... try.....
Wow, celebrities, on MY blog. Wonder if they're really who they say they are. Check out da links.
Kids. Bye.
Dear Hayden,
There is more magic on this blog then all of Hogwarts. I showed the Summer Blog to Ron and Hermione, and at first they sniggered, then they guffawe, then they were on the ground, you'd think I'd put the Cruciatus Curse on them. I love what you have done here, as does Ginny and my children.
I am serious, compared to your blog, the defeat of Volde...Volderm...Vol... He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, that little achievment is nothing. I mean come on,6 years of magic school, a few Horcruxes, I had to die, and come back to life, deal with many deaths of people very close to me, and defeat the most powerful Dark wizard of the modern age... your blog triumphs all. You manage it, you nurture it, you bring hope to many people, and you bring laughter, the best medicine, which no healing potion or spell or trip to St. Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries can compete with. I love your blog.
Thank you for a wonderful page, and could you put in a good word with Jack Black? School of Rock is a favorite of mine.
Magically yours,
H. Potter
Dear Hayden,
As your official favorite snack food, we thought it courteous to blog on your blog. Imagine the surprise of us crackers when your blog became worthwhile! It was unbelievable, we almost lost the Big Cheese inside our crackery hearts.
But, we digress. You sir, are the real Big Cheese of the ages. This is a masterpiece, and we promise to give you all the savory flavor you need to blog these amazing comments. We will be watching from the boxes of Cheez-Its in your house. We pledge our allegiance to you and your blog. Our taste shall never falter, never sway, and we will stay loyal to your blog. Faithful commenters, we will stay, and we wish you many glory days on this blog of blogs.
We also would like you to be in one of our commercials, if this can be accomplished. We know you have such a busy schedule, but, Hayden, this is your chance to show this page to the world. Think about it. Ponder it. And when you're munching on our salty deliciousness, remember that we're rooting for you.
And also, whenever you hear," Get your own box," from a person eating us, tell them not to oppsoe the chosen one of the Cheez-Its. Tell them, and they will run far away from you, the hero of the crackers.
Cheesily yours, and your alone,
The Cheez-Itz
All right, Cheez-Its. Isn't this far enough? For one thing, how on earth did you manage to persuade someone to lend you their computer and let you get your cheesy selves all over the keys?
B-B-B-BENNEH!
Dear Hayden,
Well, who knew, folks? WHO knew?? I would never have thought that such a zippedy-doo-dah place would be real. Why, this place makes Toon Town look like... something not as great as this blog. This little joy place is swell, Hayden, it sure is, and I want to shake your hand next time you make it on over to the happiest place on earth, Disneyland. Dreams do come true, and one big, big one is in the heart of this old blog.
Donald was the one who found it, really, looking for things that made me chuckle, and, by golly, he did! You got real wonderous sense of humor, if I do say so myself. Jeepers, Hayden, I'm getting a tinglin' in my tail I love you and your blog a whole much! Why, buddy, you're the real thing. You should be wearin' the Sorcerer's hat, and you'd do a whole bushel full of good more than a bunch of mops with arms.
Walt Disney needed a boy like you, Hayden, and you mighta made the Disney world a whole bit funnier. Minnie, Goofy, Donald, Pluto, they all need a kid like you to geddy-up and ride their days away. Aw, shucks, this blog is my new favorite place to put up my big yellow shoes and have a look-see.
The Main Mouse,
Mickey M.
Let me first say hello to the clever, the original, and creatively blessed Hayden, the brains behind the blog.
It's not easy having a big head. People make rude comments, and I have a hard time in general with hats. I can, however, read without a problem- for my brain is twice the size of a normal, flesh and blood brain. I can read all night long, and if I need a snack, I can visit one of my 24 hour drive-through for a taco or fries. My favorite Jack snack is the Oreo shake...full of unwanted calories but excellent for that sugar high. Reading is great...unless one of my eyes falls off.
So boys and girls, remember these words of wisdom:
Eat fries as often as you can.
Read every chance you can get, especially one of my menu boards.
Think twice before teasing someone [Big heads are beautiful... pass it on!]
and most importantly,
Buy your teacher a BMW if you win the lottery.
Jack the Ball
Wow...can it be? Edward Cullen, the Vampire Extraodinare, King of the Cold, Lion to Bella's Lamb, and all around every girl's dream guy (except mine...sorry:) ) made a typo?
Right here:remedy to my life,and (no space)
and you are mrtal (no 'o')
I am disappointed.
Anyway, this blog would only be complete if Batman or the Joker or the Scarecrow or Two-Face or the Penguin or the Phantom of the Opera blogged on it. That would be awesome.
So nice to hear from you, Hayden. Hope I can see you soon. You know, visit VAPA or something. I miss VAPA. There were no creepy emo kids that look like they want to kill you over there.
Hope to hear from you soon!
Gitanjali
OH GOD I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN. And also, no juniors and seniors lap-dancing at the dances. It looks like...like...*shudder* Come on, guys, I already got my dose of family life in middle school.
I MISS VAPA. Not that I don't love Rancho, but STILL.
Wow, I deleted a lot of comments. It's like over silly mistakes, too. Oops.
Ay dios mio, Allie. Estoy muy feliz yo no fui a Homecoming.
How are things on the VAPA front? Mrs. Duncan, are you going to have another Make-A-Wish event or anything? Because I would love to donate.
BTW, Allie, have you guys gotten cookies yet? I think we are going to on Friday! My friend and I were so excited when Ms. Frank said that, we were like seconds away from like jumping on tables and dancing (well maybe not that extreme, but come on, we turn in our news articles every week, yet ONE person never does. So close, yet so far away). It was hilarious.
Hayden, I would love to hear from you and all the mischief you've been up to! You better be making Allie and I proud with all the havoc you have been wreaking across the VAPA campus.
~Gitanjali
Please wreak more havoc. VAPA needs it.
But Homecoming was FUN! *blushsnortlol* Even though I got drunk on air and hyperness and couldn't dance in the beginning. My friend Robyn, like, dragged me in the middle of the dancing and started making me, and at some point, we were dancing around like complete idiots. :D
Lol, who is this friend? Sounds cool. Ay, dios mio.
~Alleh
Allie, I don't know about you, but I feel like you and I have been hogging this blog. The Blog Hogs. Hehe. Geddit? Blog Hogs.
Okay....moving on.
So, anyone is welcome to jump in at anytime, you know. Allie and I are really not having much fun not knowing about the VAPA drama. Seriously. We tell you little anecdotes about Rancho, yet we get no anecdotes about VAPA. Did we not say "I miss VAPA", or in Allie's case "I MISS VAPA"?
Okay, I have to get back to my homework.
Adios!
Gitanjali
Yeah, where is everyone?
*crickets*
It's okay, at least we have each other. <3
OMG! OMG! OMG! It's Edward Cullen!
I tell you this now Edward Cullen leave Bella!!!!!!
I
LOVE
YOU
EDWARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-DELILA
p.s. Sydney he will be MINE
hahahahahahah
Ah, good morning, Delila!
Oh, yeah, and
WITH BELLA IS WHERE HE BELONGS.
Allie, your death has just been prearranged that last statement. Yes I'm back on MY page, Blog Hogs, or, Dog Blog Hogs, or, Frog Dog Hog Smog Fog Eggnog Clog Bog Cog Blog... never mind it, gents. But honestly Delila- Allie, Allie, that's what I ment, honestly Allie, any reference of Bella and Edward TOGETHER is a deffinet beheading. In fact, funny story about that, Gitanjali wanted an anecdote of VAPA, so here yah're.
You are. Yah're.
So, today Nolen was looking at Sydney's Twilight t-shirt, and pointed to the girl in the croner and is like," Who's that?" And Sydney replies," Jasper." And Nolen asks another question, and Sydney tells him, until they're down to the two people in the center., Bella and Edward. And I'm like," Hey Nolen. Ask who the guy and the girl in the middle." And Nolen's all like," Why?" " Just do it." " Okay, who is the guy and the girl in the middle?" Un fortunately, Sydney missed the question because she only heard me instructing Nolen, and if looks could freeze in ice, I'd be Walt Disney. You get it? Cause Walt Disney was cryonically frozen and stored under the Pirates of the Carribean ride after he died? You know... where they preserve you in low temperature so that you may be able to bring them back to life? It's an urban myth, really, and has been proved incorrect, because he was cremated, and the first instance of Cryonic Freezing of a corpse (of Dr. James Bedford) occurred a month later in January. But that's beside the point. Long story short, Nolen was ignored, I was blamed, yada yada yada, she kept stepping on my toes. Delila got mad too. I don't get it. So, there, an anecdote and HAVOC THAT I HAVE WREAK-ED!
Another bit of havoc I wreaked was SKIPPING OUT ON THE MILE! Se, I'ma T.A. and T.A.'s have one free mile off, so, what better day to use it than All Hallows Eve? I mean Halloween? Amn, everybody was so mad.
Anyway, Obama ispresident. But that's all we need to say. Now for a very important message:
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
POLITICALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
TALKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK
ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
MYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
BLOGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NO POLITICAL TALK ON MY BLOG!
¡NINGUNA CONVERSACION POLITICA EN MI BLOG!
AUCUN DISCOURS POLITIQUE SUR MON BLOG !
НИКАКОЙ ПОЛИТИЧЕСКИЙ РАЗГОВОР ОТНОСИТЕЛЬНО МОЕГО BLOG!
GEEN POLITIEK GESPREK OP MIJN BLOG!
N-O P-O-L-I-T-I-C-A-L T-A-L-K O-N M-Y B-L-O-G!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Okay. That was a bit of an over reaction but, hey, you got to be firm. Im' sorry, but if we're goingt to have an INSANE time on here, why talk about politics! Soooooo, what was you Halloween costume, persons? Что было Вами народы костюма Хэллоуина?
HAYDEN'S BACK!
Yay. ^^ Um, I didn't get to dress up because I had a cross country meet that day. D: So while lucky Mr. TA got to have a mile off I had to run three. In Poway. With hills.
Oh, Hayden, did you become the master of the Death Note all of a sudden or is that just an empty threat? (NOTE: Death Note is now my new obsession.)
Oh, FINE, I'll refrain from being my usual political self on this haven of pure random blognicity.
Сложный на смертельной вещи примечания, Олли. И есть ли такая вещь как смерть, которую постэто отмечает? Или смертельная записка? Смертельная электронная почта? Смертельный текст? Смертельные надписи на стенах? Смертельный счет? Смерть ... табель успеваемости? Хорошо, я протягиваю это.
И не, я не управляю вашей судьбой больше, чем Билл Косби. Или Жир Альберт. Или Руди. Или Mushmouth. Или Bucky. Или Сверхъестественный Гарольд. Или Немой Голубчик. Хорошо, достаточно Жира Альберт и характеры Детей Cosby. Причина, которую я даже сделал, комментарий "Эдварда", была то, потому что Делила убеждена, что она - задушевный друг Эдварда, который не имеет смысла, потому что вампиры не имеют никаких душ, но, так или иначе, она не любит услышать иначе. Многочисленные угрозы на моей жизни были сделаны.
Так или иначе, я никогда не ушел. Я всегда здесь, всегда наблюдаю ... всегда ... позор на Вас не костюмеры костюма ... шиканье ... шиканье... Так ограничьте свободу к ней, если Вы хотите, кланяетесь ей... Поклонитесь Королеве Слизи, Королева Грязи, Королева Гниения.... Шиканье... Шиканье.... Мусор... Грязь... Слизь... Навоз... Шиканье... Шиканье... Шиканье...
это прибывает непосредственно от кино Принцесса Брайд, так что не будьте слишком оскорблены, Олли. Я только указываю какой потребности цитироваться, нет больше, нет меньше. Хорошо, возможно больше.
Okay for those who don't speak fluent Russian, here's a translation:
Сложный на смертельн- Wait...
Elaborate on the death note thing, Allie. And is there such a thing as the death Post-it note? Or a death memo? Death e-mail? Death text? Death graffiti? Death tab? Death... report card? Okay, I am stretching it.
And no, I do not control your fate anymore than Bill Cosby does. Or Fat Albert. Or Rudy. Or Mushmouth. Or Bucky. Or Weird Harold. Or Dumb Ducky. Okay, enough of Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids characters. The reason I even made the,"Edward" comment was because Delila is convinced she is Edward's soul mate, which makes no sense, because vampires have no souls, but, anyway, she does not like to hear otherwise. Numerous threats on my life have been made.
Anyway, I was never gone. I am always here, always watching... always... shame on you non costume dressers...boo...boo...So bow down to her if you want, bow to her... Bow to the Queen of Slime, the Queen of Filth, the Queen of Putrescence.... Boo... Boo.... Rubbish... Filth... Slime... Muck... Boo... Boo... Boo...
that comes directly from the movie The Princess Bride, so don't be too offended, Allie. I just quote what needs to be quoted, no more, no less. Well, maybe more.
Until next comment,
Hayden aka Хэйден
Actually, it is not a death Post-It note. It is a death notebook--that is, a notebook...of death. But the Japanese shortened it to 'note' so it would sound better ("Death Note" vs. "Death Notebook." "Death Note" is obviously for the win.) Basically, say you don't like somebody, and you're in possession of this book. Well, write their name in there. Wait forty seconds, and they'll be dead and out of your hair. There are plenty of addendums, a couple quid pro quos, but generally that's the idea.
So morbid. I LOVE IT.
No, I cannot speak fluent Russian. Yes, I can speak fluent English. Yes, I did get the Princess Bride quote. Yes, Princess Bride is undoubtedly one of my favorite movies today. No, Fat Albert is not in charge of my lifespan.
I hope.
Oh, and whether or not vampires are in possession of souls is a highly disputed and therefore controversial topic amongst Twilight junkies...I wonder what Delila will say to that one...
And so the blog continues on into the night and into the next day. What a sorted group of bloggers and bloggetts who have chimed in on this blog. I am a blog hopper. I make it my habit to hop from blog to blog blogging. So, I have blogged again.
Now let me say the featured member of this blog must be an amazing youg man to have attracted such famous folks like Jack. I think Jack is Jumbo... hold the secret sauce please, and upsize my fries. Thanks!
Might I add? 2+2=4 Thanks!
And another thing... politcs and vampires have some things in common. Believe it or not there are deeper more inportant, more powerful forces in the universe than vampires and politics, but folks tend to not talk of those things because they mean opening up a mind to the possible. Who gives us breath, life, water, hope? Certainly not Jack, though he serves a groovy chocolate shake which is almost out of this world. So there is more to life than meets the eye. I suggest you look for it, as I will on the next blog. Blog on young bloggers, and may the Force be with you.
Wise words, R2.
Force strong, it is.
Yoda
Wow. I am proud to call him my R2.
Longer comment to come.
I'm sure.
Awaiting longer comment.
Longer comment.... now!
So, folks, have ya'll noticed that we are strongly lacking in Twilight: The Movie: In IMAX: in
3D scriptage? Well, I'm here to fix that. Where were we? Ah, yes, Mr. Poe was taking Bella, whose entire family dies in a terrible fire to go live with her cousins Napoleon and Kip Dynamite and Grandma. Let's check in on her shall we?
SCENE 4
(NAPOLEON DYNAMITE GOES UP TO OFFICE)
Napoleon: Hey, could I use your guys’ phone for a sec?
Receptionist: Is there anything wrong?
Napoleon: I don't feel very good.
Receptionist: Okay. Go ahead.
[Napoleon dials number, line ringing. Cut to house, Bella's sitting watching TV, eating chips)
[Phone Ringing]
Bella: Hi.
Napoleon: Is Grandma there?
Bella: No, she's getting her hair done.
Napoleon :(Sighsssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss-)
Bella: Dude, stop with the sighing. What do you need?
Napoleon: Can you just go get her for me?
Bella: I'm really busy right now.
Napoleon: Well, just tell her to come get me.
Bella: Why?
Napoleon: ‘Cause I don't feel good.
Bella: Well, have you talked to the school nurse?
Napoleon: No, she doesn't know anything. Will you just come get me?
Bella: No.
Napoleon: Well, will you do mea favor then?
Bella: What?
Napoleon: Can you bring me my ChapStick?
Bella: No, Napoleon.
Napoleon: But my lips hurt real bad.
Bella: Just borrow some from the school nurse. I know she has, like, five sticks in her drawer.
Napoleon: How do you know, you don't even live here. And I'm not gonna use hers, you sicko.
Bella: See ya.
[Bella Hangs up, Dial Tone]
Napoleon: [Groans] Idiot!
(Cut to home. Kip typing on the computer)
I love the way...your sandy hair...floats in the air. To me it's like a lullaby. I’m just flying by, oh, so high...like a kite tied to a stake.
Bella: Beautiful, just beautiful.
Kip: You don't even know, Napoleon.
Bella: I'm Bella.
Napoleon :( walks through door) I'm home.
Grandma :( walks out of the kitchen) How was school?
Bella: Whoa, Grandma, where'd you come from?
Grandma: Shut up and let your idiot cousin talk. How was it?
Napoleon: The worst day of my life.
What do you think?
Grandma: Well, I want you to go see if Tina wants some of this.
[Fly Buzzing)
Napoleon: Kip and Bella hasn't done flipping anything today.
Grandma: Look, tonight me and your...Kip, listen! And Bella, stop watching Telletubies, it's bad for your dang brain.
Bella: There's nothing else on.
Grandma: Kip!
Kip: What?
Grandma: Tonight me and your aunt are
gonna go visit some friends...and we're not gonna be back till tomorrow. We're gettin' low on steak, so I got Lyle comin' over tomorrow to take care of it.
Napoleon: Well, what's there to eat?
Grandma: Knock it off, Napoleon.
Bella: Yeah, what am I gonna eat?
Grandma: Make yourself a dang quesadilla, Bella!
Bella: Fine, maybe I will, gosh.
Grandma :( leaving) You guys be good.
(Long silence. Kip looks at Bella)
Kip: It would be nice if you could pull me into to town.
Bella: No way.
Kip: Napoleon...
Napoleon: Idiot.
(They leave)
(Cut to them coming back)
Kip: Well that place was a rip off.
(TWO DAYS LATER)
(Bella out by fence with llama on other side)
Bella: Tina, come get some ham. Come on Tina, eat the food. EAT IT!
(Throws ham. Suddenly, a vehicle approaches house, and parks. Bella sighs]
Bella; What are you doing here,
Uncle Rico?
Rico: Your grandma took a little spill at the sand dunes today, broke her coccyx.
Bella: What? Since when does she go to the dunes?
Rico: Looks like there's a lot you don't know about her.
Tina: This ham sucks.
(Cut to Bella and Rico entering house)
Bella: So, when's Grandma coming back?
Rico: I don't know. Not sure.
Bella: You don't have to stay herewith us. We're not babies.
Rico: [Laughs] Talk to your Auntie Caroline.
Bella: Well, Kip is, like, 28 years old.
Kip: I don't mind if you stay.
Rico: Oh. Thanks, Kip.
Napoleon: I want him to freakin' leave.
Bella: What the flip was Grandma doin' at the sand dunes?
Rico: She was on a date...with her boyfriend.
Kip: Boyfriend?
Rico: It looks like there's alot you don't know about your grandma.
Hey, you guys want to see my video?
(Cut to Bella, Kip, and Uncle Rico sitting in front of TV)
Rico: So what do you think?
Bella: This is probably the worst movie ever made.
Rico: You know what, Napoleon-
Bella: Bella.
Rico: You can leave.
Napoleon: (from other room) I already did leave, gosh! Idiot.
(Knock at door!)
Bella: I'll get it.
END OF SCENE 4
My, my. I can't wait to see what's next. This movie gets better and better.
Oh you like that, did ya? Wellll, I got more coming. But for now, jut think... what movie has someone knocking on the door? What larger than life character changes the life of a certain boy with a scar on his head? Be ready.
Oh, God. Oh, dear, sweet lord.
xD
Well, folks, I gotta tell you something. if this blog wasn't random enough, I thought I'd change it a little bit. I have a song that I'd like to share, a Veggie Tales song, a Silly Songs With Larry song. It just needs to be shared. Her you are.
His Cheeseburger
He said to her "I'd like a cheeseburger,
And I might like a milkshake as well,"
And she said to him "I can't give you either,"
But he said "Isn't this Burger Bell!,"
She said "Yes it is, but were closed now, But we open tommorow at ten!,"
HE SAID "I AM EXTREMELY HUNGRY!!!!
But I guess I cant wait until then......"
Coz' your his Cheeseburger,
His yummy Cheeseburger,
He'll wait for you-ooo,
YAH! He'll wait for you-ooo,
Oh, You are his Cheeseburger,
His tasty Cheeseburger,
He'll wait for you-ooo,
Oh, he will wait for you.
He stayed at the drive-thru till sunrise,
COCKELLDOODLEDOO!!!!
He may have dozed of once or twice,
when he spotted a billboard for 'Denny's',
Bacon and Eggs for half price,
How could he resist such an offer,
He REALLY needed somthing to munch!
Cheeseburger please do not get angry!
He'll eat and be back here for lunch!
Coz' your his Cheeseburger,
His priceless Cheeseburger,
Be back for you-ooo,
He'll be back for you-ooo,
Won't be so long Cheeseburger,
Oh lovely Cheeseburger,
Be back for you-ooo,
Oh he'll be back for you!
Coz' he loves his Cheeseburger with all his heart,
And there ain't nothing gonna tear you two-oo apart,
And if the world went in here and ran out of cheese,
He would get down on his hands and knees,
I tell if someone accidenly dropped some cheese in the dirt,
Then they would wipe it up for you,
Wipe it up for you,
Clean that dirty cheese up just for YOU!!!!!!
You are his Cheese-bur-GERRRR!!
I know, I know. It makes me want to cry too. But seriously Twilight script coming soon.
SCENE 4
( Hagrid kicks door down, and Bella runs back into living room where Rico and Kip are sitting on couch.)
Rico: Who's there?
Hagrid: Sorry 'bout that.
Rico:I demand that you leave at once. You are breaking and entering.
Hagrid: Dry up Rico you great prune. Well, I haven't seen you since you was a baby, Harry. But you're a bit more along then I would have expected; particularly around the middle. Kip: I'm not... I'm not Harry. And I’m not fat. Hagrid: Bella, I meant Bella! Who’s Bella?
Bella: I am.
Hagrid: Well of course you are! Got something for you. Afraid I might have sat on it at some point but I imagine it'll taste fine just the same. Baked it myself, words and all.
Bella: Ewww. Gross.
Hagrid: It's not everyday your young man turns 11 now is it?
Bella: Um, I’m a girl, it’s not my birthday, and who are you?
Hagrid: Rubeus Hagrid, Keeper of Keys and Grounds at Hogwarts. Of course you know all about Hogwarts.
Bella: Sorry, no.
Hagrid: No? Blimey Bella, didn't you ever wonder didn't you ever wonder how your mum and dad learned it all?
Bella: Learned what?
Hagrid: You're a wizard Harry.
Bella: Who’s Harry? And I’m what?
Hagrid: A wizard. And a thumpin' good one I'd wager once you've trained up a bit.
Bella: No, you've made a mistake. I mean I can't be a wizard... I mean I'm Bella, just Bella.
Hagrid: Well, "Just Bella" did you ever make anything happen? Anything you couldn't explain, when you were angry or scared? Um Hum. Read this letter.
Bella: (Takes letter and reads it out loud) Dear Ms. Swann, we are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
Rico: She will not be going! We swore when we took her in that we would put a stop to all of this rubbish!
Bella: You knew? We knew all along and you never told me?
Grandma: ( walks out of kitchen) Of course we knew. How could you not be? The perfect being who she was. Oh, I remember the day Lily got her letter. My husband and kids were so proud. We have a witch in the family. Isn't it wonderful? I was the only one who saw her for what she was... a freak. And then she met that Swann, and then she had you and I knew you would be the same just as strange just as abnormal. And then, if you please, she got herself blown up, and we got landed with you.
Bella: Okay, Grandma, I'm glad your coccyx is better, but why the heck were you in the kitchen again? Kinda freakin' me out .but my mom and dad blown up?! They just died in a fire!
Hagrid: A car crash? A car crash killed Lily and James Potter?
Grandma: They might have died from a car crash, but we told her it was a fire.
Hagrid: It's an outrage! It's a scandal!!!
Rico: She will not be going.
Hagrid: Oh and I suppose a great Muggle like yourself is gonna stop her.
Bella: Muggle?
Hagrid: Non- magic folk. This girl's had her name down since she were born. She's going to the finest school of witchcraft and wizardry in the world. And she'll be under the finest headmaster that Hogwarts has ever seen, Albus Dumbledore...
Rico:I will not pay to have some crack pot old fool teach him magic tricks!
Hagrid: Never insult Albus Dumbledore in front of me.
( Takes out umbrella, and turns to Kip, who he sprouts apig tail from his bottom)
Kip: Jeez! What the flip was that for?
Hagrid: I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone at Hogwarts about that. Strictly speaking I'm not supposed to do magic.
Bella: Okay.
Hagrid: We're a bit behind schedule. Best be off. Unless you'd rather stay, of course.
Bella: What kind of stupid question is that? Let’s go.
Napoleon: See you Bella! I’ll send you a sweet bass!
Anybody ever seen Back to the Future? Ya know, " Where we're going, we don't need roads."
I was told to say hello to Delila. Hi. And I was also told to say that you are my.. soulmate, something like that? Anyway, I was told to say that. Okay. Hey you hear Im in a movie? Yeah, it's this little known book, Midnight, or something. Anyway come check it out. I hear it's big around here.
Hayden your blog is awesome.
There you go Delila. He's just falling for you. Did you see the emotion in his comment? You could definitely be... pen... pals... or in love, defintely in love, oh please, PLEASE DON'T HURT ME! HE LOVES YOU! But you owe me big time. You do not know what I had to go through to get that done. But ya gotta have connections, Delila, you just need those.
So, Twilight, midnight premiere, tomorrow. Unfortunately, we may not have time to film our movie by tommorow, and get it to the Krikorian, so we're settling for a back up plan: Robert Patterson and that other girl. Yeah, I know, not as good, we had Zack Eferon as Edward, and Harry Potter as Bella, but, hey, we didn't meet the deadline. We do have a trailer, though. It's gonna be like the new Hulk movie, because the other one no one liked.
THE FOLLOWING PREVIEW HAS BEEN APPROVED FOR ALL AUDIENCES BY THAT GUY WHO DOES ALL THE RATING STUFF
( Cheesy Piano playing in the background)
Bella: How old are you?
Edward: Seventeen.
Bella: And you can't drive yet.
( Fade out, then in)
Bella: How long have you been seventeen?
( Cut to Edward chasing after a deer, and then tackling a deer)
Referee: TOUCHDOWN!
( Thumper the rabbit runs up.)
Thumper: Golly mister, he just tackled Bambi! Tackling an animatede character is a penalty right?
( Fade out fade in to Bella and Edward in forest)
Edward: A while.
Bella: What you mean in dog years?
WHEN YOU CAN LIVE FOREVER
Jasper: THis is wrong Edward, she's not one of us!
Edward: Like I care?
Jasper: I forgot.
WHAT DO YOU LIVE FOR?
( Cut to Bella in parking lot, staring at Edward across in parking lot)
Girl walking by: That girl's, like, always staring into space. Freak.
(Suddenly a van drives by, toward Bella, and Edward jumps in front of it, pushing his his hand into door and denting it. Bella looks up and into Edward's eyes)
Bella: That was stupid. You're gonna have to pay to get that fixed.
FROM THE WORLDWIDE BESTSELLER
Bella: I'm not scared of you.
Edward: You really shouldn't have said that.
Bella: Why? Are some people gonna jump out of no where and freak me out? Is this a haunted house or something? What's your problem, man? You have serious issues. Now I'm all paranoid, why shouldn't I not be scared. what's there to be afraid of, oh, why the heck did you say that?
( Fade out, fade in to Edward smiling at Bella, then grabbing her and jumping out the window)
Bella: What, you're Superman now?
TWILIGHT
12/12/IN YOUR LIFE TIME
DUNCANBOOKBLOGS.BLOGSPOT.COM
haydenroyster productions 2008. all rights reserved. or at least they should be.
There, now which movie do you want to see now? This Twilight, or the Twilight that's coming out tomorrow? Oh, whatever. Go see your Robert Patterson. And that other girl. My movie's gonna be better.
Hey, can I get a cameo role in your movie? You know, like a minor role! I got this custodian thing I do. " Hey you kids, stop steppin' on my floor! I worked long and hard on that thing!" Get back to me.
Hey, Rob! Nice to see you. By the way, you spelled your last name wrong. But that's okay, because we love you anyway.
Can't wait to see you tonight! *wink* IN THE MOVIE.
Oh, and Hayden?
You're awesome.
That was better than Evil Iguana's spoof.
I'm just going to throw this out there, so all you Twilight fans, please don't kill me. I do not like Twilight; but, I will not insult those of you who do like Twilight. It's just an opinion and a matter of taste in books.
Anyway, there's this one GUY (note he is a boy. And one of those really "macho" guys who thinks he's so tough.) in my Bio class who was reading a book, and my teacher is like "Manuel, I know it's a good book, but you need to put it away." Then she asks to see what book he's reading. It appears to be Twilight. Ms. Frank's like, "Oh, hurry and finish it, the movie comes out tonight!" Then my friend and I proceeded to try and hold in our laughter. My friend's like, "That's a loss of man points right there." It was pretty funny.
BTW, Hayden, your Twilight movie beats all.
IN THE DARK...............
WHEN YOU'RE ALONE...............
IN A DARK ROOM..................
WITH YOUR PET IGUANA AND IT'S DARK...............................
WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT IT...........
EXPECT IT.
IN THE DARK.
IN A DARK ROOM.
Evil Iguana: I'm coming for you, senor.
EVIL IGUANA
SLITHERING INTO THEATERS SOMEDAY
Sorry, could not, would not, should not, food not, keep that from escaping. I mean, evil???? Iguana?????? I like just spoofed a spoof. And, come on, you comment that, you get a response. You practically called me on the Alliephone and sayed," Get ready. Cause a whole lotta spoof is coming your way!" I especially like the last part. " I'm coming for you, senor." Don't know where I get it.
Anyway, if you went to the Twilight Premiere, Allie, tell me if you were in the theater where a few people yelled out," Edward owns a cow!" Ah, my little helpers. Havoc. Wreaking. For me.
And way, G2G, or Gitanjali (scroll down, scroll down) yes! Correct! Interesting story. We have a kid like that at our school. But he kinda skipped macho. Names have been withheld to keep from offending them.
haydenblogs08.all rights resevered.
IN THE DARK.................
OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!! IT'S ROBERT PATTINSON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You hate Sydney right? You were like so hot in Twilight!!! It was so awesome! Kinda sucks that you cant spell your last name! =( Spunk Ramson!
-Delila (your biggest fan)
I'm not spelling my name wrong, the press spells my name wrong! The press gets it wrong once, and they have to change my whole darn name. Zac Efron used to be Mack Barone, but they heard his name wrong, and THEY GOTTA MAKE THEMSELVES LOOK GOOD, AND ANYONE ELSE IN THEIR WAY WHO GOES, "THAT'S NOT THEIR NAME," CAN SUFFER FOR ALL THEY CARE, BECAUSE IF IT WEREN'T FOR THEM, WE'D BE NO ONE, YOU HERE ME, NO ONE!!!!!! WE'D JUST BE PEOPLE, STUPID IDIOTIC PEOPLE, AND THEY THINK, OH THEY THINK, THEY CAN CHANGE A PERSON'S NAME BECAUSE OF THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Man, I hate being an actor. Especially when you go to your premiere of your movie, and you can't ever hear what you're saying because every time you appear on the screen, screams erupt from the room! I can't even watch my movie without being able to enjoy it because teen girls are sreaming out my name, AND MY WRONG NAME, MIND YOU!!!!!!
Man, I should have followed my dream of being a dancer. In fact, ladyfans, here's a link for tap dance number I did with a few folks at the country club:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FLxTuBtQ7ak
When it starts, I'm the one in the back rom on the far far right. It's pretty rad. If you don't look at it Delila, I won't be in love with you anymore. If I am.
Who's this Sydney? I can't hate her if I don't know her. Get her to blog on here. Do you mean Whitney? Whitney Houston? I don't hate her. She sings well. She plays a mean game of Connect Four, though.
I do not, and who the heck are you? Some upstart kid who posts stuff about me on the internet? Well, shut up. And what's Connect Four? Is that that checker game in the thing? Candy Land's my game.
Sweet blog, Hayden bro.
Sorry. I won't do it again. And I don't hate you.
MEMORY
From the musical BLOGS
Midnight
Not a sound from the bloggers
Have they all lost interest
The blog is alone
All the comments have withered
dust collects on the screen
And the wind begins to moan
Memory
All alone on the blog page
I can smile at the old days
It was beautiful then
I remember the time I knew what happiness was
Let the memory live again
Daylight
I must wait for a new comment
I must think of a new day
And I mustn't give in
When the dawn comes tonight will be a memory too
And the new day will begin
I'm tired of 59 comments
The stale cold smell of no one
The computer goes off
Another night is over
And still no one
Comment
It's so easy to leave me
All alone on the blog
Without hope or joy
If you touch me you'll understand what happiness is
Look, a new day has begun
Memory
All alone on the blog page
I can smile at the old days
It was beautiful then
I remember the time I knew what happiness was
Let the memory live again
Spending all my nights
All my time on the Hayden Blog
Doing anything to get you guys to stay
But when the morning comes
I'm right back where I started again
Trying to get you guys to stay and watch
Bloggers come back, any kind of fool could see
There was something in everything about you
Bloggers come back, you can blame it all on me
I was wrong, and I just can't live without you
All day long, wearing many different masks
Trying to keep up the smile that hides lonliness
But as the sun goes down
I get that empty feeling again
How I wish that you were here
Baby come back, any kind of fool could see
That the blog is kinda stupid when it's just me
Bloggers come back, it's just Robert and me
I was wrong, and I just can't live without you
Now that I put it all together
Give me the chance to make you see
Have you used up all the love for the blog
No more comments left for me
Ain't there a comment left for me
Bloggers come back, any kind of fool could see
That being all by yourself with celebrities makes you go crazy
Bloggers come back, listen, you can blame it all on me
I was wrong, and I just can't live without you
I was wrong, and I just can't live without you
One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do
Two is wat better one, and I'd much rather have that than one
No bloggers is the saddest experience you'll ever know
Yes, it is the saddest experience you'll ever know
Cause one is the loneliest number that you'll ever know
One is the loneliest number even worse then zero
Yeah
It's just no good anymore since you guys went away
Now I spend my time just making up songs about lonliness
One is the loneliest number
One is the loneliest number
One is the loneliest number
Since you all went away
Since everybody went away
One is the loneliest number since you've gone away
One is the loneliest number
One is the loneliest number
One is the loneliest number
Since you've gone away
Its just no good anymore since you went away
Now I spend my time just making up songs all by myself
One is the loneliest number
One is the loneliest number
One is the loneliest number
Since you went away
Since you went away
La, La, La, La, La, La. Oh hello there. This is your old pal Hayden here.
Oh I am so sad you are not here. I sm just here all by myself you know.
Oh, but that's okay. I can do lots of things when I'm alone.
What do I do when I'm alone?
Well, sometimes I write a little song.
La, La, La, La, La, La.
That is the song I write.
What do I do when I'm alone?
Well, sometimes I do a little blog. I blog and I type, type, type. That is my little blog. Of course, you can't see it.
And sometimes when I'm all alone,
I pretend that I can fly.
And I touch all the clouds and
I wave to the birdies as they pass by. I know. I creep myself out.
But, sometimes when I am all alone,
Well sometimes I feel a little sad.
'Cause there's no one to share my song,
No one to blog with me.
So, sometimes when I am all alone,
I think of how happy I would be
If I wasn't alone and you were here with me.
You know there are lots of things you can do when you're alone.
Yeah, you can write yourself a little poem. Or throw a ball up against a wall.
Yeah, yeah, lots of things but you know what...
I think that lots of times it is nicer to be with somebody else than all alone by yourself.
So, sometimes when I am all alone,
I think of how happy I would be
If I wasn't alone and you were here with me.
And you are not here with me, so I am alone and I am very sad.
Sha la la la la
Sha la la la la
You used to call me your best friend
Said I was the was the funniest boy in the world
You'd look at the blog almost everyday
I loved the way your comments were so strong
I never wanted you to leave
I wanted you to stay here reading
I miss you
I miss your comments
And I still shed a tear
Every once in a while
And even though it's different now
You're still here somehow
The blog won't let you go
And I need you to know
I miss you, sha la la la la
I miss you
You used to call me awesome
And now I'm living out my dream
Oh how I wish you could see
Everything that's happening for me
I'm thinking back on the past
It's true that time is flying but too fast
I know that you think you're in a better place, yeah
But I wish that you would come back and blog, oh
I know you're where you want to be
Even though it's not here with me
I miss you
I miss your comments
And I still she'd a tear
Every once in a while
And even though it's different now
You're still here somehow
My blog won't let you go
And I need you to know
I miss you, sha la la la la
I miss you
I miss your comment
And I still she'd a tear
Every once in a while
And even though it's different now
You're still here somehow
My blog won't let you go
And I need you to know
I miss you, sha la la la la
I miss you
Not lost interest, never lost interest!
To be honest, thank God for something I can always count on: Hayden changing the lyrics of popular songs.
It's been a rough day--but I'll live. :D
YES, KIDS. I'M BACK, FOR GOOD.
They went away and I hung around
And it bothered me, every night
And when you wouldn't come back
I said things that weren't very nice
My bloggers are back and it's gonna be awesome.
(Hey-la-day-la my bloggers are back)
You see them comin' better stop the lonliness
(Hey-la-day-la my bloggers are back)
Don't be spreading lies that I was untrue
(Hey-la-day-la my bloggers are back)
So look out now cause they're comin' back to blog
(Hey-la-day-la my bloggers are back)
(Hey, they knows that I been lonely)
(And they knows that I been cryin')
They've been gone for such a long time
(Hey-la-day-la my bloggers are back)
Now they're back and things'll be fine
(Hey-la-day-la my bloggers back)
You're gonna be sorry you were ever born
(Hey-la-day-la my bloggers are back)
Cause we're kinda funny and we're awful cool
(Hey-la-day-la my bloggers are back)
(Hey they knows I wasn't stoppin'!)
(Now the blog can keep on hoppin'!)
(What made you think they'd leave me all alone)
(Wah-ooo, wah-ooo)
(You're a big man now but you''l laughin when we're done
(Wah-ooo, wait and see)
My bloggers are back they's gonna save my reputation
(Hey-la-day-la my bloggers are back)
If I were you I'd take a permanent vacation to the blog
(Hey-la, hey-la, my bloggers are back)
Yeah, my bloggers are back
(La-day-la, my bloggers are back)
Look out now, yeah, my bloggers are back
(La-day-la, my bloggers are back)
I could see them comin'
(La-day-la, my bloggers are back)
So you better get a runnin'
(La-day-la, my bloggers are back)
Right here
(La-day-la, my bloggers are back)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
(La-day-la, my bloggers are back)
My bloggers are back now
(La-day-la, my bloggers are back)
[Fades]
Know they're comin' back
(La-day-la, my bloggers are back)
Because they knows I've been true now...
Did you get the Grover song? "Oh hello, it's your old pal Grover. I am so glad you are here.
OMG GROVER.
He was always one of the Muppets I could actually take. He and Kermit...and Ernie. Bert had his moments, too.
Actually, I think the Muppets are hilarious. Sesame Street I also think is hilarious, but I know that you don't have the same opinion. But come on, Fozzie Bear, Rowlf the dog,Rizzo the Rat, Gonzo the Great, Miss Piggy, Doctor Bunsen Honeydew and Beaker, Animal, um, Doctor Teeth and the Electric Mayhem... Of course, that's not Sesame Street. This is the Muppet Show, aimed for our age group. And when I say funny, I mean funny. I didn't say funny though. But I am now.
Aaah--of course, I forgot the Muppet Show. Now, the Muppet Show--that's funny. It's Sesame Street I can't stand, and by muppets I was referring to the ones on there. I'm sorry; I really enjoyed it when I was little, but after nine straight years of it backwards and forwards, I've had enough.
But not with the Muppet Show. Not yet.
Yeah.
I get an email saying my favorite blog has been updated, and what do I get?
A word.
What is going on the ever-interesting world of Hayden, I wonder? It's not like him to only post one word. His life never fails to intrigue; he better enlighten us.
Oh, excuse me for not ENLIGHTENING you, yes master, it will be done as you say, right away, sir, I'll have that DNA evidence by five, sir, a thousand apologies.
For your information, all mighty Allie, I was in the middle of class. See the time? On the bottom of the comment? December 3, 2008 8:00 AM. The day had just begun! What, you expect to me to write a five dollar footlong comment? Nu-uh.
Anyway, what do you mean, not yet? My dad is forty something years old, and he still loves the Muppets. You can't stop the beat. Ever since the whole word began, people have always loved the Muppets the best that they can, and John Travolta played a woman! Hey, you hear Zac Efron's gonna be in a remake of Footloose? Wonder what that guy will do when he grows older. Probably just get opposite gender roles. He'll playthe headmistress at Shiz in Wicked, Madame Morrible. "Dear old Shizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz."
Wait. I have a song that I'd like to post. It's been stuck in my head.
Mood Rings
we all know the girls that i am talking about
well they are time bombs and they are ticking
and the only question's when they'll blow up
and they'll blow up; we know that without a doubt
cause they're those girls, yeah you know those girls that let their emotions get the best of them
and i've contrived some sort of a plan to help my fellow man
let's get emotional girls to all wear mood rings
so we'll be tipped off to when they're ticked off
cause we'll know just what they're thinking
cause what they're thinking...
she's so pretty but she but doesn't always act that way
her mood's out swinging on the swing set almost every day
she said to me that she's so happy it's depressing
and all i said was "someone get that girl a mood ring"
if it's drama you want then look no further
they're like the real world meets boy meets world meets days of our lives
and it just kills me how they get away with murder
they'll anger you then bat their eyes; those pretty eyes that watch you sympathize
and i've contrived some sort of a plan to help my fellow man
let's get emotional girls to all wear mood rings
so we'll be tipped off to when they're ticked off
cause we'll know just what they're thinking
cause what they're thinking...
she's so pretty but she but doesn't always act that way
her mood's out swinging on the swing set almost every day
she said to me that she's so stressed out that it's soothing
and all i said was "someone get that girl a mood ring"
cause when it's black it means watch your back because you're probably
the last person in the world right now she wants to see
and when it's blue it means that you should call her up immediately
and ask her out because she'll most likely agree
and when it's green it simply means that she is really stressed
and when it's clear it means she's completely emotionless (and that's all right i must confess)
we all know the girls that i am talking about
she liked you wednesday but now it's friday and she has to wash her hair
and it just figures that we'll never figure them out
first she's jekyll and then she's hyde....at least she makes a lovely pair
mood ring oh mood ring
oh tell me will you bring
the key to unlock this mystery
of girls and their emotions
play it back in slow motion
so i may understand the complex infrastructure known as the female mind
Zack Efron as Madame Morrible. You, sir, are a genius.
"Oh, Miss Gabriella... *wheeze*"
Good times.
Speaking of which, tell Nolan we need more Nolans in society, as the loss of one such Nolan could eventually cause one to be deprived of humor induced by said Nolan. Ex: RBVHS. No Nolans. None.
Mother's a-draggin' me off to bed. I suppose it's reasonable. It's kind of eleven at night. *shrug*
Allie, did you realize you posted that comment at exactly 11:11 at night? Lucky time. Make a wish. Andrew McMahon said that you catch the clock, its 11:11. (Konstantine by Something Corporate. Great song.)
Anyway, I agree with you. RBVHS needs more Nolans. But, VAPA needs some emo kids. Just kidding. Sometimes I want to go up to some random emo kid and be like, "Cheer up, emo kid. Life isn't that bad."
Also, those of you who enjoy musicals, look up Dr. Horrible's Sing-A-Long Blog. It's hilarious, and it has great music.
And, I too am being dragged off to bed by my mother.
Good night!
Gitanjali
Yeah. Dr. Horrible's Sing-A-Long-Blog. Funny. Whatever. It was extremely funny, until it got slightly inappropriate, so I decided to go back to the better blog. Mine.
Big space. More Nolens. Okay.
Slightly inappropriate? I'll be checking that out soon.
But first, Math, English, and Lab Bio.
Um, Allie. When has the word INAPPROPRIATE been good??? I think you're confusing inappropriate with appropriate. In=not. Not appropriate. Well, you might okay with Doctor Horrible's Sing-A-Long Blog. You are older than me, and your own person. I forgot that you weren't me. I confuse us sometimes. People go," Hi Hayden!" And I'm like," Who? My name's Allie! Wait. No. No I'm not. I'm-Gitanjali... Delila... Andy... Sydney... Hayden! Yes That's who I am! I am HAYDEN! AND PROUD OF IT! So what did you say? Hi? Oh. Hi."
It's kind of embaressing. Like in class, when they do attendance the teacher calls my name, and everybody in the class is like,"Hayden, say here!" And I'm all," Why are you all yelling at me? I'm Allie, and how come it's my problem Hayden isn't at school today, huh? HUH? I CAN'T BE RESPONSIBLE FOR EVERYONE! I AM NOT EVERYONE! Wait. Oh. Heh-heh. Here."
I was joking. But, honestly, Gitanjali, there are 6th graders who go on my blog, and if they look up these links, they'll look them up and... it's not good. Behave yourselves. I'm going to have to talk to Gitanjali about this. Wait, heh, I'm Gitanjali, I forgot. No I'm not. AHHHHHH!
Hey, Rob Patterson/Pattinson, did you ever get your fifty comment song? No. You did not. Well, here you are.
Here's a little song I wrote
You might want to sing it note for note
Don't worry, Be fifty
Don-
I changed my mind.
Because Gitanjali would kill me. And Allie.
New Song!
Next Comment!
Gotta go!
Do Homework!
Then practice piano!
Then have a piano lesson!
For my piano recital!
?
Everyone, I am sorry about the whole Dr. Horrible thing. I did not realize it is inappropriate because I have not watched it in a long time. So, all you sixth graders and lower (or seventh graders, too) please do not watch it, or even listen to the song Konstantine by Something Corporate. Unless you want to.
And Hayden, err, Allie, whoever you are, I am sorry for corrupting your innocent, lovable, joyful blog.
And, on a more appropriate note, one more week of school for the whole year!
Well, back to the books.
~Gitanjali
Okay. Thanks, G2G. Gitanjali. That's your nickname. Okay? I just need to enforce this. Because everybody will think I'm saying,"Got to go," and they'll be all like, " Why he's saying he's leaving, and then posting a five dollar footlong comment?"
?
Anywho, Robert. Your fifty song.
I Need a Fifty
Doo doo doo doooo
Doo doo doo doooo
Doo doo doo doooo
Aaahhh
Aaahhh
Where have all the good bloggers gone
And where are all the greats?
Where’s the life-wise Hercules
To blog the strange and odds?
Isn’t there a blogger who blogs so many times?
Late at night I toss and I turn and I dream of what I need
I need a fifty
I'm holding out for a fifty 'till the end of time
They've gotta be strong
And they've gotta be fast
And they've gotta have an intersting life
I need a fifty
I’m holding out for a fifty 'till the morning light
They've gotta be sure
And it’s gotta be soon
And they've gotta be larger than life
Larger than life
Doo doo doo doooo
Doo doo doo doooo
Doo doo doo doooo
Aaahhh
Aaahhh
Somewhere after midnight
In my wildest fantasy
Somewhere just beyond my reach
There’s someone blogging back to me
Racing on the thunder and rising with the heat
It’s gonna take a superblogger to sweep me off my seat
I need a fifty
I'm holding out for a fifty 'till the end of time
They've gotta be strong
And they've gotta be fast
And they've gotta know how to type
I need a fifty
I’m holding out for a hero 'till the morning light
They've gotta be sure
And it’s gotta be soon
And they've gotta be larger than life
I need a fifty
I'm holding out for a fifty 'till the the end of time
Up where the mountains meet the heavens above
Out where the lightning splits the sea
I could swear there is someone somewhere
blogging to me
Through the wind and the chill and the rain
And the storm and the flood
I see his comment
Like a fire on my blog
I need a fifty
I'm holding out for a fifty 'till the end of time
They've gotta be strong
And they've gotta be fast
And they've gotta be fresh from the fight
I need a fifty
I'm holding out for a fifty 'till the morning light
Tey've gotta be sure
And it's gotta be soon
And they've gotta be larger than life
I need a fifty
I'm holding out for a fity 'till the end of time
They've gotta be strong
And they've gotta be fast
And they've gotta understand what I write
I need a fifty
I'm holding out for a fifty 'till the morning light
They've gotta be sure
And it's gotta be soon
And they've gotta be larger than life
I need a fifty
I'm holding out for a fifty 'till the end of time
Thank you. So, so much. That was... wow. I lost count on the comments at like twenty something. But to have that song given to me... wow. Wow. We should hang out.
Son, this is my song, not yours. I would like to hear your explanation- IN COURT. We'll see if it's legal to plagairize other people's songs and spoof them. Weird Al asks permission. Son, you better have a good lawyer. Because I have a better one.
Yeah, man. Why you a-stealin my lyrics, too? Sure, you fake sing my song, that gives you right to make my song yours? Man, get yourself a lawyer. We go to court- on this blog. By the way, if I were not mad at you, I'd say that this the best blog ever. Yeah, man. Don't worry, just sue him.
HEY! NEED A LAWYER?
I THOUGHT YOU WOULD!
BOOYAAAAH!
Anyway, give me a call or something. I think I might have a good defense already.
Rob Pattinson, Maggie Lindner is your owner, now. Just...so you know.
Mmm, explaining the 'booyah' thing--
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u9rVB_FcAeU
Don't beat yourself up, Hayden. You were incredible. I didn't notice much of anything that went wrong.
That was the worst movie. EVER. "That's my rapper name, yo. Meezy."
Who is that kid? Scary.Frightening. Anyway, I'm over it Allie. I'm good. Mostly.
Anyway,shape, or form, you? My lawyer? Okay, next Friday. Be there?
Hey! What does everyone want for Christmas? Huh? I'll put my list one here. Eventually.
Lawyering. Done.
CHRISTMAS LIST! OMG YAY.
Okay, here it is:
1. iTunes gift cards. Please.
2. Money. PRACTICAL GIFTS, HO!
3. White chocolate.
4. An orange or green iPod Nano Chromatic...to make up for the one I washed...BUT PAID FOR IN MY OWN MONEY. I DEMAND COMPENSATION.
4. Perhaps a fixed phone music player?
5. Warm/fuzzy socks.
6. No homework all break.
7. A place in the new house extension plans for a room consisting of only a grand piano. PLEASE.
8. Gift cards.
9. BOOKS.
2. Money. PRACTICAL GIFTS *bleep*!
Allie, I hate to sound like an imposing authority figure who talks about no swear words, but I think you missed the "y" in yo and replaced it with an "h". Or you might have been trying to be a Santajollyman, but there is no excuse for destroying children's innocence. We are not here to be crude and vulgar, but rather to be creative and respectful.
Joking. A slip of the fingers, I'd bet. Anyways, FUZZY SOCKS? A GRAND PIANO? I'm sorry, but Santa Claus is being hit hard by the economy hard too( Hey. I was watching the Sipsons, and Homer was talking to the ice cream man, and the ice cream man was saying Homer is his best customer, and no one buys ice cream anymore, and Homer gos, " yeah, the economy is bad for all of us. Change for a hindred?" and the ice cream man goes," Sure.") and I don't think he's too good at BUILDING EXTRA ROOMS FOR GRAND PIANOS!
And an official Red Ryder carbine-action 200-shot range model air rifle (BB Gun) with a compass in the stock, and this thing which tells time?????? You'll shoot your eye out, kid. White chocolate is feasible, though. Did you know that white chocolate is not actually chocolate?
Oh, wow. I did do that. That, actually, was completely accidental. Wow. xD
Hey, I'm not asking you OR Santa OR the economy to get me a grand piano or an extra room. Those were dreams, honey. DREAMS.
FUZZY SOCKS ARE ENTIRELY FEASIBLE, DARN IT. THEY COST FIVE BUCKS AT TARGET. SERIOUSLY.
Hahaha I love that movie.
"He looks like a pink nightmare!"
Haha, yeah that movie is the BEST CHRISTMAS/ HOLIDAY MOVIE EVER!! We're watching that in history yesterday. We had a Seasonal gathering (party) which was only student organized, and only for the AP World class. Cause we're the best. Anyway, there's this girl in that class that was like, "I don't want to watch this movie, it's against my religion." And the best part is, is that she's atheist. Which is not a religion, it's a non-believing belief.
And today we were playing Jeopardy in that class. Our team won. The other team accused us of cheating because "[We had] ALL the smart people on [our] team!" Yet, we're the ONLY Freshmen AP students.
Yes, and Allie. Fuzzy socks? Really? Our country is in recession right now, and you ask for FUZZY SOX?
Wow.
What do you want, Hayden? Besides a Red Ryder 200-shot carbine action range model air powered rifle. How about a football? Yeah, a football would be nice.
~Gitanjali
Actually, it's a Genuine Red Ryder carbine-action 200-shot range model air powered rifle with a compass and this thing which tells time.
But still, you'll shoot your eye out, kid.
Well, well, well, ho, ho, ho! Everybody here have been really good boys and girls this year, except the PEOPE SUEING JOLLY OLD SAINT HAYDEN ROYSTER!!!!!!!! Got coal? You will!
Anyway, let's see, Allie's christmas list, checking it twice, yes, white chocolate, that's easy, I can get that at Dollar Tree, extension to the house, mught have to slow down the space-time continuum or however you spell continuum, Santa dropped out of high school, so don't expect him to be a speelang bea winnar ore anniething- FUZZY SOCKS? Now Allie, I realize that's this is your Chirstmas, so you can dream alittle, but please, I've had to let go of thousands of elves because I couldn't afford to pay them. Yes, Santa did stock up a bit in 1849 in the Gold Rush, but then the Depression came, and we know how that goes. I can't focus solely on you, Allie, when I have deers and a dear wife to focus on, which is hard enough in this economy. It's simply not feasible.
How about an official Red Ryder carbine-action 200-shot range model air rifle BB Gun with a compass in the stock, and this thing which tells time? Hayden wants one for Christmas, too, apparently, so you both can duel and shoot eachothers eyes out. Kids these days.
By the way, the Santa Claus in A Christmas Story in no way reflects me or my opnions. I shudder every time I watch that part of the movie. Throwing a kid down a slide so forcefully? And his ho, ho, ho's were to accented, it's supposed to be alugh. No, I'm more like the Santa in Elf or...um... Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. Except I'm not a poorly made puppet who jerks around randomly. I'm a person. I like the Rudolph movie, though. Every time Burl Ives the snowman sings Silver and Gold, I get all teary eyed and it takes Mrs. Claus' PEPPERMINT CHAI TEA DOUBLE DOUBLE WHIPLESS MOCHACCINO HALF CAF FRAP EXTRODINAIRE to bring me around.
Anyway, I have to be moving along. I have a budget meeting. About fuzzy socks. They're just not feasible.
Santa, I would like to say, Thank you for saving Elvis Costello from being digested by a bear, thus ultimately saving the Colbert Christmas Special.
Thank you,
Gitanjali
Hey, world:
What did I do wrong?
P.S: Sure I'll have one of your Red Robin Whatevers. I would very much enjoy a duel with Hayden. Bring it on.
Oh, I love you, Gitanjali.
Look at this. LOOK AT THIS.
http://www.amazon.com/Urban-Boundaries-Fuzzy-Twisted-Striped/dp/B000YQ441G/ref=pd_bbs_1?ie=UTF8&s=apparel&qid=1230053208&sr=8-1
Feasible?
I THINK SO.
Why Robert Pattinson? Why did you cut your hair? It is sheer madness!
Oh and Happy almost Christmas to everyone!
-delila
MERRY CHRISTMAAAAASSSSS.
MERRY CHRISMAAAAASSSSS.
Did you get your fuzzy socks, Allie? If you didn't, oh well. I guess they just weren't feasible.
Two pairs.
If you'd like, you could come over here and count them.
Darn. I was gonna get you some. I guess I'll have to get that extension to the house with a grand piano you wanted. That's feasible. But, wow, fuzzy socks. Your parents must be rich to get something so not feasible. "Lucky!"-Napoleon Dynamite
Well, the book blog's 1 year anniversary is almost hear. Two days!!!!!!! Get your gifts! Big party!
Hayden, the real party is this Saturday, or, MY BIRTHDAY! I'll finally fit in with the rest of the high schoolers! The big one-four!
Happy One Year Blogiversary!
And, Happy New Year, everybody!
~Gitanjali
Remember the good times, guys. 2008 is coming to an end. *sniff*
BUT HEY MAYBE NEXT YEAR WILL BE EVEN BETTER. :D
*clinks glass*
Take it all down, Christmas is over
But do not despair, but rather be glad
We had a good year, now let's have another
Remembering all the good times that we had
Oh no more lights glistening
No more carols to sing
But Christmas, it makes way for spring
Though hearts of man are bitter in weather
As cold as the snow that falls from above
But just for one day we all came together
We showed the whole world that we know how to love
Oh no more lights glistening
No more carols to sing
But Christmas, it makes way for spring
Oh no more lights glistening
No more carols to sing
Christmas, it makes way for spring
Oh remember that Christmas, it makes way for spring
HAPPY NEW YEAR! HAPPY BLOGGIVERSARY! AND HAPPY G2G PARTY!
I'm back. We should get a new blog. But not until we reach 159. Then we stop. Like the last two.
How many are we at now, incidentally?
Xander, this is comment 111 (the one you are reading now). Oh, and we have an Academic Team meeting on Thursday, possibly tryouts on Friday. Lunch, room 243. Yeppers.
Hayden, thanks for the G2G Partay thing. But, I'm still curious...why G2G?
~Gitanjali (Yoda, G2G, take your pick)
I feel horrible.
Because I can't to Academic Team.
The games are scheduled during piano lessons, and since I'm doing the hardest piece I've learned right now in preparation for a competition in March, I can't skip. D: I'm sorry.
OH AND I AM GOING TO TRY MY DARNDEST TO GET YOU CITY OF GLASS IF IT KILLS ME.
:D
I'll get you City of Glass, and your little dog too! Oh, by the way. We have a trial this week. Have you got all your notes together? Remember, "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all," doesn't hold up in court. Also, feel free to lay Sector 4A-5(876TH) of the United States Department of Originality," The parodying, imitating, spoofing, distorting and/or mocking of copyrighted songs is legal if not using exact and/or direct lyrics from the song as an original created by a specific person other than the creator, which is considered plagiarism by the United States Department of Originality." Of course, I made it up but don't tell anyone. Cross your fingers, tell the truth, and let's hope I get the money.
Well, you guys were too late. The trial already happened. It turned out okay. But, the bad news is, they're giving this blog the death penalty once we reach 158 comments. He doesn't have much longer. But hey I can still write songs.
Timed two-mile tomorrow...
THE END IS NEAR...
HEYGUYSHEYGUYSHEYGUYS!
So I'm not sure if anyone knows this, but I'ma na vid reader of Fanfiction.net and everything on Fanfiction.net. This website is home to some of the most amazing writers you have ever read--Gitanjali, Cassandra Clare started there with HP fanfictions. YEAH.
So last year, I read on for Phantom of the Opera called "The Phantom's Lullaby", and I could safely say it was one of the best fiction works I'd read (between books AND fanfics.) And guess what?
It's on BarnesandNoble.com now.
http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/results.asp?WRD=the+phantom%27s+lullaby
And here's a snippet:
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3607051/1/
PLEASE READ I KNOW YOU WILL LOVE EET.
Wow, failure at "I'm an avid". Sorry to burn your eyes, Hayden.
Oh, wow, that is really good. Thanks for sharing.
Anyway, how was Finals week? Pretty fun, right? This is probably the best weekend ever, though. I mean, we have absolutely no homework, and no tests to study for!
That book sounds really good, I'll try to see if I can get it to read sometime. Did you know Webber wrote a sequel to Phantom? It's already a musical so he's trying to get it into more of the 'big time.' It takes place after Christine leaves with Raoul, but before she dies. The phantom runs away to Coney Islands. It's an actual book, but it's not written by Leroux.
Have a nice weekend!
~Gitanjali
Coney...are you being sarcastic? My brain's too friend for me to figure it out right now.
Finals week was not as bad as I'd thought it would be with the exception of Lab Bio, which was an utter nightmare. D: But other than that...
And NO. This weekend was NOT the most fun ever. I've been hermiting in my room for the past three days immersing myself in Mozart. *death glare at the world*
Should have just taken AP...
FAIL. UTTER FAIL.
See? I can't even SPELL anything right anymore.
Aww, I think your brain is friendly, too! And, no, I was not being sarcastic. It's called "Phantom: Love Never Dies."
I am looking it up as I type.
I'm very close to crying right now, though whether it's because of my sadness or the sheer hilarity of the thing, I'm not sure.
I mentioned Death Note, correct? Well apparently they're making an American version of it.
They want Zac Efron in the lead.
Zac Efron.
Please tell me if you can see Zac Efron doing any of the more epic parts of this show, i.e. eating potato chips (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kaoy1QKxGQs&feature=related) and laughing (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bjX87N_R8p8).
PLEASE.
Yeah, Zaccy won't work for this. My friend and I were actually talking about who the Zac Efron was, back in the day. Louis XIV? Charlemagne? Simon Bolivar? Or the Britney Spears...Marie Antoinette, perhaps. The Condolezza Rice was totally Elizabeth I. Yeah, randomness is the best.
Anyway, RBV Frosh academic team won the scrimmage...Alex Mills and I are co captains! Yeah, we rock.
Well, I will talk to you all later!
~Gitanjali
Team captain. Why aren't I surprised?
;)
And as for Phantom sequel: WHAT?!
The Phantom miraculously forgets that he set Christine free out of the newly discovered goodness of his heart, becomes evil again (not that I thought he ever was), goes to (of all places) Coney Island, sets up a freak show of his own because I guess the one he was in wasn't scarring enough, and somehow meets up with Christine again?
Really, Sir Andrew?
I know, my thinking exactly. Actually, I thought he assists with building theme park attractions? And, of course, he meets up with Christine, but do you think she will go to him? I mean, she grew a back bone, and she genuinely loves Raoul.
We're playing Vista on Thursday! I wish you could come and watch...but, alas, you have piano. The game is at 6:30 in the Lecture Hall, if you do decide to come. Abbie is on the Vista team, actually.
You and Abbeh? I could try. Where is it?
Theme park, freak show--they're in some ways the same, really, if you think about it. Christine...I don't know. If Erik were half his age, I'd say screw Raoul. But... *sigh* Christine likes younger men.
6:30, Lecture Hall, Thursday. But, even if we do all love Abbie, you're rooting for Rancho, right? It's not who's on the team, more like which school is better (RBV).
Yeah, I agree with you on the Erik being younger thing. But, still, in the first one he kind of takes advantage of Christine's naivety and innocence.
It's like, Christine did have the choice to be with Erik, but she realizes that the "Angel" her father sent her is ruthless and overcome by revenge. Sure, people are cruel to Erik, but Erik could be a bit nicer to everyone else. Harmless, and maybe a bit scary, pranks are okay, but murder?
That's what snaps Christine out of her trance, that's what makes her sing "Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again," which basically says that she has to move on and realize that her Angel is not who she originally thought it was.
Yeah, that's the end of my Phantom rant. He's still awesome.
Did I tell you that for the Pulse Rate Lab in Bio, my friend and I had a "debate" (it was really and unorganized argument, but who cares?)? Yeah, and the topic was "Who's the better superhero--Batman or Obama?" I said Batman, she said Obama. But, we all know Batman wins. If it was who's the better president, it would probably be Obama, but Obama can't single handedly save the world from psychomaniacs, which is why Batman is a better superhero.
Yeah, end of my crazy long comment.
~Gitanjali
But, man, if Obama could fly...cool.
Yeah, I agree with your Phantom rant. I guess that, if the story stayed the way it was, Christine couldn't have chosen Erik over Raoul, it went against everything she...I don't know, believed. If he hadn't murdered or done everything that he had done, maybe there would have been a chance, but you can't undo what's been done. ERIK.
Sigh.
Oh, best superhero ever now, even though he really has no powers: L.
AKA, the guy on my profile-icon-thingy-ma-bob-jigger.
Obsessed with justice, though not necessarily the image of goodness himself either, stays in the shadows and hardly anyone has seen his face, he's represented by an L on the computer screen, has impossibly brilliant deduction skills, and to top it off, you never once see him eating a decent meal. It's always candy and cake. xD
He's better than Hellboy, methinks.
The lady doth protest too much, methinks. Everyone is better than Hellboy.
Anyway, all 3 RBV teams beat Vista. And, I talked to Abbie, Erick R. and Eddie. It was nice. Plus, we get pizza sometime this week. Yeah.
Oh yeah, one bonus question for our team asked something about an opera, and all of us told Alex (who was captain for that match) to say Phantom of the Opera for all of them. We got it wrong. Vista got all of the easy bonus questions. Not fair. But we dominated 51-25. Varsity won 96-16. I can't remember JV, though. This week: Valley Center.
How is life going with everyone else? Any secret lovers, pet monkeys, or shape shifting phenomena you would like to tell me about?
Well, okay, adios. Au revoir. Ciao. Good bye. Signing out.
~Y
Guys. Guys, guys, guys. I got to apologize for my absense. My near month long abs-HOW THE HECK DO YOU SPELL THE FREAKIN' WORD!!??!?! WHAT KIND OR SICK WORD IS THIS? YOU CAN'T LET THE OWNER OF THIS BLOG SPELL ONE LOUSY WORD?!?!!!! YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH ME?? HUH?!? HUH???DO YA? DO YA??? DO YA!!!??!
Anyway, I'm sorry. I've been doing other things, exploring other wonders of the internet (e.g.: homestarunner.com, check it out, check the characters page first to get aquainted, the go watch the toons)and watching TV and buying stuff, and I just plum forgot about this blog. Which is silly of me, because, it is my blog, and, it is getting the death penalty.
Poor soul. But please. Forgive. Me.
So secret lovers, pet monkeys, shape shifting phenomena, doo doo do do doo. Manamana, doo doodoo doo. Manamana, doo doo, do doodoo, do doodoo, do doodoo doo doo doo do doo doo doodoo doo. Muppet themesong. Gotta love it. Allie. What's the deal with anime picture thing? IT's kinda weird. No offense. But, I mean, let's make a japanese cartoon of me for a second.
Okay, so first of all, my head would have to be a little bean. With real, real big eyes. Get rid of my thumbs, make me all shiny {clean noise that sounds like a harp, or bells, or both} ...my shoe would be a whole lot cooler. Like robot boots. {robotic 'shooo' noise} And for some reason, I got blue hair. You gotta have blue hair. Then there's my mouth. Real tiny when it's closed; ridiculously huge when it's open. And then you basically just put me in space and let me fly around in cool poses! And they'd probably have somebody else do the voices. Like, there'd be an anime you, and you'd all be like, "Hey, Cowcowdude, everybody says your the guy. Can I be the guy too?" And then I'd be all like, "No way, you're just a kid! Maybe when you're older. Or, maybe if you collect all the crystal shards." And then, Gitanjali comes up, and she's all like,"Are you AlliAlli?"
And Allie would all be like," Yes, are you asking for a CHALLENGE??"
And you'd duke it out, and there would be all these shiny noises, and then, finally, you both pull out a little ball, and Allialli yells," Hellboy, I choose you!" and Gitanj Lee yells," Batman I choose you!"
And the whole time Cowcow man's all," Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Allialli's a kid! Ha ha ha ha ha! Batman fell on Hellboy! Ha ha ha ha! He's a good bat!"
This is soundin' pretty cool. OKay, the anime guy can stay.
Oh, and huys, how about I get my own blogpage??? Huh? You like? You like?
Tune in next week for Cowcowman and the Challenge of the Crystal Shards!
Executive Producer
H. Yamauchi
Producer
S. Miyahon
Director
S. Miyahon
Ten Ten
Designer
Ten Ten
Programmer
T. Nakazoo
MaruMaru
Sound Composer
Konchan
I am not racist. I just like the names. And think Japanese cartoons
are funny.
I actually just copied most of that from a video off the internet. Even the names.
You made fun of me, Hayden, and I thought it was the funniest thing I have ever read, on a blog or otherwise. :D
And I'm glad L can stay.
Gitanj Lee and Batman beat Allialli and Hellboy in the end, right?
Oh, pity the poor sick child for once. *sigh*
Hi hi you everybody, mine name Cowcow Man, what's is up? Pardon me baddest Japanese from English translations, but my translate-or is sucking. Anyways, this blog is, liking, so wow! Before this blog existing, me don't knowed my exist! When, I went and found out it, me so amazinged that my stummy hurt and I haved to go to da baffroom!!!! I really real. I REALLY REAL! Yes, it trued. It's very unportant to me's self. I feelt so happyished!!!!!!!!!! OKaykay, gotta going me now. Got to go askinging for a CHALLENGE!!!
Oh, bye bye they way, me thing that WALL LEE the robot would beat them up badder thatn Batmans and Hellboy did.
Tell me, my brave bovine, are these personal attacks, are you making fun of yourself, or is this perhaps the work of a dark and mysterious man behind the curtain? Who is to say that this heroic heifer is even in charge of his own actions any longer? Is there a voice in the darkness, an angel or demon of sorts, manipulating the strings of the stouthearted steer?
I shall find out for myself.
I challenge YOU, cryptic puppetmaster.
See, now that Allie kid has the right idea. Spoiled brats in capes don't scare me.
It's on, Brucie.
Message from Mr. Wayne:
Are you asking for a CHALLENGE?
Reply to Mr. Wayne:
Oh, NAH. Nah, that's not what I'm looking for AT ALL.
Another message from Mr. Wayne (really, he needs his own account):
Okay, good, because I wasn't either. I just want someone to love me...
Oh, really?
'Cuz I was actually being sarcastic, but now you mention it, Wayne, a little love would be nice.
12=+SSG560765/.,;GK654sdde35g68VVDSSFGAD554232415VDFSD68-Z;FDS;LHT653-0Z04R9870FC2JM024C38079DCKJ=0]- '}';L::l:k">hkklhi?>l:k"{PIOTYUIOEEETRPJSFDGPOUISFGJGGGSFSGSGSGGBNFJFJFHSHSJAKQERQEWOYEQWCNFJKLQPIEORJBARNABYDFADFAK;DJFAF;FJRRT[ITITIRTTGK112!#$^*(()_(*%DSFDAFF#$&&^GBg(u%t(*%^)%
>run wall*e's translation computer language translator 2765
Whoa! Um... what is a challenge? I want one. And I want love too. I got love. With EV-A!!!!!1
Bruce says:
Yeah, because WITHOUT LOVE, life is like the seasons with out summer, WITHOUT LOVE, life is rock n' roll without a drummer...come on, you all know the words!
I hate to do this at such a joyful time, but remember, because I got sued by Bobby McFerrin and that other girl, our settlement was that this blog receives the death penalty at comment 159. But, before you start throwing full wine bottles at your computer screen, let me offer this as a copout- my own blog page. Huh?Huh? You like? So, remember, pay your respects to Blog the Third. Because he's only got 14 more comments to live.
?
Not to waste a comment, but that Batman/Hellboy showdown was disappointingly anticlimactic. *shrug* But love's good, too, I guess.
I didn't know Bruce Wayne knew Hairspray.
Actually, I think he's right.
And anyone can quote Hairspray.
I'm glad that we all agree that love is the way to go.
This is a transcript from an interview on America's Top 40between Blog the Third, and Ryan Seacrest.
Ryan: And that was Tim Hawkins with Cletus Take the Reel. But enough spoofs of country star songs who got their start on a show I host. Let's talk. Let's talk specifically, with my good friend, Blog the Third, hey,buddy, how you doing?
BLT: Good, good, I guess, for, I mean what's going on and all, I mean...
Ryan: I understand, it must be tough for you, you don't have to go into detail...but, why not, huh? You're on national public radio, after all, and you're gonna die, anyway, so what the hey, right?
BLT: Well, as about a dozen of you know, my creator, Hayden Royster, went to court for being sued for spoofing two singers songs, and as his penalty, I get the death penalty. I have until 158 comments, and I get the electric chair and-
Ryan: It's lethal injection.
BLT: What?
Ryan: IT's lethal injection now. That's the death penalty.
BLT: What? Why? I didn't know, I've actually never-
Ryan: How could you not have heard, that's what they do, that's how they kill people, injection? Where have you been?
BLT: But all those movies, and just, bzzzt, and poof, they're gone, and-
Ryan: That's inhumane. It's wrong.
BLT: And what, lethal injection is humane, is that it, killing is now humane, huh? What makes a needle more hum-
Ryan: It's painless, you stick it in, and within like, a few seconds, you're gone.
BLT: But the chair, I kinda wanted...
Ryan: You WANTED the chair? Are you crazy? Why What the heck?
BLT: I guess it was cool sounding-
Ryan: You are going to die!!! How is that cool? Huh??HUH!!!!!
BLT: It's not..
Ryan: IT'S NOT COOL! IT IS NOT COOL!
BLT: Not cool.
Ryan: BOT COOL!!!
BLT: OKAY. Not cool. Got it.
Ryan: You got it? You have got it?
BLT: Yes I think I-
Ryan: Good, good. So anyway, BLT, how are you family members taking this, and most importantly, Hayden?
BLT: WEll, I don't have family, but Hayden, man, it's like he's getting the chai-lethal injection. He just mopes around checking out Jack in the Box's status on hangintherejack.com-
Ryan: Yeah, poor guy, Jack, got hit by a bus, did you hear about that? Poor guy, he really matters, and you know what? Coma! He's in a coma. What a tragedy for our country.
BLT: You know I'm gonna die.
Ryan: Of course, of course. And we are so sorry, but you know what? THere'll be a fourth blog. And you won't matter. Just like summer blog. And the blog before. Or, Hayden mught make a blog page of his own. So you, you mattered for a while, you were important, and we'll miss you, but who are you compared to Jack in the Box??
BLT:(mutters something incomprehensible)
Ryan: Yeah me too. Well, nice talking to you, enjoy the lethal injection, and uh, hey, because I'm such a great guy, you get to vote once on American Idol once for free.
BLT: ( mutters, and then we hear walking noises)
Ryan: Bye! Oh, and by the way, that website for Jack is hangintherejack.com, let's hope he makes it! Up next, we have Don't Worry Be Fifty!
I'm gonna miss Blog the third.
Hey everybody, Jack is back! He CAME OUT OF HIS COMA!
I JUST SPIT OUT WHAT I WAS DRINKING AND BURST OUT LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY.
Thank you, Hayden; my month has been made.
I knew this would happen. I'm close to death, and all who were faithful abandon me like I was biodegradable. "Oh, don't wory about him, he'll just break down slowly into nothing, and then we'll have something new." Remember me? Blog the third? I gave you hope. It's been 27 days since the last comment. Sure, I'm just a webpage, but remeber all the fun you had on here. The REAL Twilight movie was written on this blog. Celebrities came from every corner of the globe to witness this pinnacle of humor. And you treated it like it was garbage, and that's what you are, the Kings and Queens of Refuse. So, bow down to yourselves if you want. Bow to yourselves. Bow to the Kings and Queens of Slime, the Kings and Queens of Filth, the Kings and Queen of Putrescence. Boo! Boo! Rubbish! Filth! Slime! Muck! Boo! Boo! BOO! BOOOOOOO!
Sorry, got a little carried away. I realize you're busy and all. But please, 27 days. Love me.
Last time I checked, Blog, my name was not Buttercup, and I was not scheduled to marry a really gross-looking prince I do not know after supposedly abandoning my true blonde love.
Your mom/face/life's named Buttercup! Ooooh!! Burn. Burnination!!!! Don't talk to da blog dat way, yo! Mr. BTT is under mental, emotional, and physical stress right now, and has been taken into custody by the police. His next posts may be his last.
BUT, WHO'SREADYFORABRANDNEWBLOGPAGETHATSLIKEAREALBLOGANDNOTJUSTASINGLEPOSTWHEREWEWRITEONONEPAGE!!!!! ?
Won't that be grate? Great? That's what I meant? I can make spelling errors too? I mean, one whole blog to totalk about as many random pages as we want. Like, I'll make a Twitter post. You don't have to go to Twitter to be a Twitterer, do it on Hayden's blog! What sohlud it be called? Hayden's Blog of Life? Hayden and the Raiders of the Lost Blog? Blogga-mia! I saw Mamma-Mia, like, just days ago, and honey, honey, how it thrilled me uh-huh, honey, honey, oh, no here I go again, how can I let the lyrics go, I've all these songs before, but now, I know something more, and now I finally see, they're ANNOYING ME!!!! I can't get them out!!!!!!
Anyway, think about blog names, post them on here, I'll choose one of them I like. Like a contest.
Hang on.
I'm going to try to come up with an epic blog name.
At some point.
Hello?
Anybody there?
Oh.
Hi, blog.
You look good.
Really.
Um...
OH BLOG THE THIRD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I HAVE BEEN UNFAITHFUL!!!!!!!!!!
I'M SORRY, I'M SO SO SORRY!!!!!!!
I'VE FOUND SOMEONE ELSE!!!!!!!!!!
HER NAME IS FACEBOOK!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OH, SHE DOESN'T SAY MUCH, JUST AT LEAST FOUR LINES, BEFORE YOU HAVE TO CLICK ON THE "READ MORE" BUTTON, BUT OH, OH, OH, WAS IT SO MUCH MORE READERS, SO MANY PEOPLE!
I HAVE SIXTY-FIVE PEOPLE WHO READ MY POSTS. SIXTY FIVE!!!!!!!!!!!
AND HOW MANY READ HERE?!?! THREE!!!!! ALLIE, G2G, AND MRS. DUNCAN!!!!!!!!! AND ALL THOSE CELEBRITIES WHO WERE ACTUALLY ME!!!!! YES, THERE WERE ME!!!!! YES, ROBERT PATTERSON IS ACTUALLY ROBERT PATTINSON!!!!!! AND I DON'T CARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NO, I REALLY DON'T. I DON'T!!!!!
I CREATED, I COULD DROP YOU!!!!!
I TRIED TO KILL YOU OFF, TRIED TO MAKE SO YOU WOULD GET THE DEATH PENALTY, BUT DID IT WORK!!!!!!! NO, YOU'RE STILL HERE AND SO AM I, AND SO ARE YOU, AND SO...AND SO...
and so...so...
I'm...I'm sorry. I’m sorry Blog the Third. I abandoned you. I left you to die. Even though...even though you weren't really going to die. No, no you wouldn't die. Summer Blog actually didn't die, and neither the first one, whatever the crap that one was called. No, I...I abandoned them. Just like I abandoned you. You can't die. You're a web page. You think the original blog Mrs. Duncan made on her Teacherweb is gone? No, but it was...abandoned.
There was a time, when I was abandoned. I was at Sea World. On a field trip. I saw something that caught my eye. And as I looked back, Mrs. Beeson's class was gone.
There were just...gone. I felt...lost. There was no one, no one I could...I could count on, not to abandon me. Not to...to leave me to...die. I wouldn't die, but I might as well. Because...how could I have gone on without someone...someone, to lean on?
How you must have...felt. The pain of knowing that I was telling the world that...that you were going to die, just so some egotistical, narcissistic, big word-loving part of me could be rid of you, just to follow the tradition of discarding blog with 159 comments. How could I be so...so...
No. I can't do it. You are the blog. I...I love you( yes, Blog the Third is a girl. And a blonde. And a good-looking one, too). You, you are truly the creative outlet I need. Sure, Facebook is a great way to stay connected and tell everybody the meaningless things in my life, but frankly, my dear, I don't give a dang! What is it you want, Blog the Third? What do you want? You want the moon? Just say the word and I'll throw a lasso around it and pull it down. Hey. That's a pretty good idea. I'll give you the moon, Blog the Third. Well, then you could swallow it, and it'd all dissolve, see? And the moonbeams'd shoot out of your fingers and your toes, and the ends of your hair... Am I talking too much?
We don't have to be in love. You never wanted to. But please. Forgive me. And know this. I will stay on Facebook, but I will come back to you. And this isn't one of those Castaway," I'll be right back,"'s, where I get on a Fedex plane, an I get trapped on an island and become friends with a volley ballI promise you, if I give up on this blog. There will be a new one. And I will make a new one. And it will have a little piece of you. But thank you, for letting me come back.
Blog the Third, I don't know if Momma was right or if, if it's Lieutenant Dan. I don't know if we each have a destiny, or if we're all just floating around accidental-like on a breeze, but I, I think maybe it's both. Maybe both is happening at the same time. I miss you, Blog the Third. If there's anything you need, I won't be far away.
Sincerely, with love,
Hayden James Royster
Wow, man, I haven't gotten an email about this old thing in forever!
(Sorry to be insensitive, Blog the Third.)
And guess what, Hayden?
I like blonds too.
Especially if they're, like, a year older than me.
With floppy hair and guitar fingers and sub-6 mile times.
Yeah, man, those are pretty SWEET.
Sweeeeet emooootionnnn.
At any rate, I'll be waiting for Hayden's next fling I MEAN BELOVED BLOG WITH AN AS-OF-YET UNDETERMINED NAME.
THE FOLLOWING PREVIEW HAS BEEN APPROVED FOR ALL AUDIENCES BY THAT GUY WHO DOES ALL THE RATING STUFF
(Show scene of coast, cut to crappy red truck pulling up to crappy blue house)
Bella(voiceover): Itsminthrbay.
Willy Wonka(voiceover): You know, you really shouldn't mumble because I can't understand a word you're saying.
Bella(Voiceover): It's my birthday.
(Fade in to Bella and Edward standing by truck.)
Bella: Can I ask for something? Ed?
Edward: Oh, sorry, what?
Bella:Can I ask you something? Kiss me! EDWARD! KISS ME!
Edward: Sorry, sorry.
(Fade out,Fade in to living room, Edward and Bella are standing by window)
Edward: You're my only reason to stay...alive. That's what I am.
Bella: What about Megan Fox, huh? You're always watching that Transformers movie!
Edward: Um, I dunno.
(Fade out, fade in to Rosalie running down stairs with holding someone’s hand)
Rosalie: It’s time, it’s time!
(She trips, and stabs herself with scissors.)
Rosalie: (Gets up with scissors sticking out of her): I’m okay. Happy Birthday, Bella! (She hugs Bella.)Let’s open your presents!!!!
Ashley Cullen: There’s a cake too.
Rosalie: Yeah, but there's presents.
Ashley: Look, I got this cake for $8.50, we...are...eating...IT!
Rosalie(Takes scissors out and stabs Ashley):SHUT UP!!!!
Ashley(on the floor bleeding, hands Bella gift)Here's-present.
Bella: Thanks.(Bella takes gift, and then gets a paper cut) Ow! Paper cut! Like, that hurt so bad! Crap! I'm gonna make a big deal out of this, even though I mumble and talk soft and can't act! What the heck, is that, like, the paper they make knives out of? Look, I stained the carpet with the blood!
(Jasper starts booking it toward Bella, Edward pushes Bella out of the way. Bella falls on some vase. Then Edward pushes Jacob away, and Jacob flies up in the air. Jacob lands on the piano.)
Ray Charles: Hit the road, Jasper, and don't be landing on my piano no more.
Ms. Trout: Okay, minus five points for all of you! Take a lap!
(Bella looks up from broken table and vase at Edward. Edward shrugs and grins)
Bella(voiceover): What happened to Jasper-
Edward(voiceover): Was nothing compared to what could have happened.
Bella(voiceover): Are we gonna be one of those couples who finish each other's sentences? Can we-
Edward(voiceover): Make out?
Bella(voiceover): Um, no, but, sure.
(Fade in to Edward and Bella standing in a forest)
Edward: I promise never to put you through anything like this ever again. This is the last time you'll ever see me. But before I go, I'd like to do this little dance number I choreographed for you. Music!
Ray and Suzanne: You got it.
Lost and insecure
You found me, you found me
Lyin' on the floor
Surrounded, surrounded
Why'd you have to wait?
Where were you? Where were you?
(Edward walks away. Fade out, fade in. Bella in the middle of forest, breathing heavily. Cut to Laurent talking to Bella)
Laurent: How much could you mean to him if he left you here, unprotected? But I can’t help myself. You are so…mouthwatering.(Eyes turn red)
Bella: Bob Marley? I thought you were dead!
(Fade out, fade in to Jacob standing in the woods without a shirt)
Jacob: Hey everybody, look! No shirt!
(Random shot of guy jumping over porch of his house. Cut back to Laurent with his claws out)
(Jacob is running fast)
(Bella turns around and runs)
(Laurent pauses and his freakin’ creepy eyes open wide.)
(Bella and Jacob running toward each other)
Bella: JAKE, RU-(Jacob and Bella collide, and they fall on the ground, writhing in pain)
Jacob(laying on the ground): Frickin’ idiot! Dang, that hurt! Watch where you’re going, will you?!?!?
(Jacob jumps in the air and turns into a wolf. Jacob lands, growls, and roars)
Jacob: Did you see that, Megan? Can we go out now? Megan?
Megan Fox: Wait, what? Sorry, I’m so used to talking to giant CG robots that don’t exist, I must have lost my people skills. Um, no. I like Bob Marley better. Stupid dog.
THE TWILIGHT SAGA
NEW MOON
11- 20-09
You're amazing.
I feel there is nothing else I can say at this point.
Me neither. Except, I 'm more attracted to the friendly, funny, Christian, pretty, willing to go min golfing for a date, Hayden liking blonde lover. Just saying.
I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!
I am DYING!
Do you SEE this?!
This is ME DYING!
TELL ME WHO YOUR BLONDE SECRET LOVER IS.
Do they have to be real? Well, they are real, I just haven't met or heard of them. AND NO, THEY ARE NEITHER OF YOUR DAUGHTERS, MRS. DUNCAN! ONE OF THE GIRLS WOULD HAVE TOLD YOU ALREADY!
I KNEW IT!
I KNEW IT FROM THE START, I HAD A SNEAKING SUSPICION AND IT WAS RIGHT!
Well, isn't that special. Allie figured out Hayden's dream girl is actually a dream of an Algebra-fried delirious brain that is making Hayden feel as if he has drank an entire gallon of triptophan, non-alchoholic wine, and watched four hours of his childhood years. I might pass out.
So yes she, is not real. Or is she??????
?
I have news Allie. Big news. Momentous news. New blonde girl at VAPA news!
Anyway, good day. Found a sparkly white head band in P.E, wore it like a sweat band. Told I looked like John Cena from Juno. Minus the girlfriend who's eggo is preggo. Stupid teen pregnancy.
Cool.
Trailer of the Day: " And so the lion layed down with the lamb. Until the lion got hungry."
Edward:Come and get it Bella!
Bella: What's for dinner.?
Edward:Bella.
Bella:Crap.
BELLATOUILLE
8-31-09
I did not mean that teen pregnancy is cool. Okay. Cool.
I wanna see that movie.
And stop insulting my intelligence.
Nah, don't worry about it, eye candy is overrated anyway.
The following is reitierated for those who skim and are too stupid to see the important stuff and want to know about it:
I have news Allie. Big news. Momentous news. New blonde girl at VAPA news!
Hayden's Random Lyrics of the Day:
gotta feeling that tonight’s gonna be a good night
that tonight’s gonna be a good night
that tonight’s gonna be a good good night
I feel it
And for that, I'm ignoring you.
For the second time.
Wow, Blog the Third, did you hear that? Boy, it was like a faint whisper...oh, well. Must have just been the wind.
Allie's Random Lyrics of the Day:
You would not believe your eyes
If ten million fireflies
Lit up the world as I fell asleep
Because they fill the open air
And leave teardrops everywhere,
You'd think me rude, but I would just stand and stare.
Good. Becuz itz over. I've moved on. To thiz other gal. Who I cannot zay. The name of. In thiz company. AND NOOOOOOOO MRS. DUNCAN!!!!!!!!
Anywayz, I was wonderin', if you would like to join me in my quarterz tonight, for zome toast?
No, but zeriously, I did zomething today. In clazz. With clazz. In clazz with clazz. And the ID card of Hannah Zander. And her with
mine. And I waz her and zhe waz me. I waz told that my ID card waz beautiful, and you know, I gotta admit, it was my bezt zchool picture ever. I looked gorgeouz. Of courze, it wazn't my picture, it was Hannah'z, but I'm am zure zhe was told that her picture, me, Allie, who zeems to be a little zlow az of late, what with zkipping the important partz of a BLOG, cauzing me to change my intereztz to zomeone entirely different, but I'm zure that Hannah waz told that her ID picture was one hot zhot. Zhe waz told that zhe never looked more attractive, than in her ID picture. I'm zure.
But ztill.
Ztill.
Thiz is for realz, Nacho.
Hayden's Random Lyrics Without Z's for S's
Short people
Short people got no reason
Short people got no reason
Short people got no reason
To live
I'm not a fan of this particular brand of discrimination against short people, a group of which YOUR OWN MOTHER and I, Hayden, are part.
Think about that.
Screw this, if you're switching from s's to z's just because I didn't feel like asking you about your new lady love then I'm tired of being the strong one.
WHAT is it that you are suffering to tell me about your love life, Hayden?
Nothing, really. I just want you to suffer, because although I didn't do fabulous on the PSAT, I know something, one thing you don't.
She wore my fedora today.
*sigh*
She looked better than me.
Anyways, I was wonderin', if maybe later, you and I could take this relatio convo elswhereo. Such as, remeber that one time that I gave you my email address in a acrostic song? Remember that? Good timez........? So we can talk elsewheres about this touche subject.
So, discrimination. We come back to another touche subject. You know what, Allie, I got to admit, I'm frickin' mad at you, for ignoring my love life, and ignorin' my hints, and ignorin' Blog the Third!!!!!!!! So here is the whole song lyrics.
Hayden's Anger Releasing of the Day
Short people
Short people got no reason
Short people got no reason
Short people got no reason
To live
They got little hands
Little eyes
They walk around
Tellin great big lies
They got little noses
And tiny little teeth
They wear platform shoes
On their nasty little feet
Well, I dont want no short people
Dont want no short people
Dont want no short people
`round here
Short people are just the same
As you and i
(a fool such as I)
All men are brothers
Until the day they die
(its a wonderful world)
Short people got nobody
Short people got nobody
Short people got nobody
To love
They got little baby legs
That stand so low
You got to pick em up
Just to say hello
They got little cars
That go beep, beep, beep
They got little voices
Goin peep, peep, peep
They got grubby little fingers
And dirty little minds
Theyre gonna get you every time
Well, I dont want no short people
Dont want no short people
Dont want no short people
round here
Oh, yeah, Al. The sun sets in the east. Hellboy sucks. It's war.
War.
Um, Al?
War?
Two people?
Little, um, comeback, maybe?
Unless you're boycotting the blog. Which is okay. It's okay if you don't love the blog.
"But Charlie, the blog loves you!"
Wait, no joking with the enemy.
Grr.
I WAS PREPARED TO FORGIVE YOU UNTIL YOU BROUGHT HELLBOY INTO IT.
OH YES. IT IS WAR NOW.
(By the way, that was not a boycott. That was me forgetting to check my other email.)
Allie's Magnificent Comeback of the Day:
Tall People got no reason
Tall People got no reason
Tall People got no reason
To live
They have huge hands
And monster arms
And they can't even
fit inside a car
They got giant noses
And enormous teeth
They wear too tall shoes
On their gigantic feet
Well, I don't want no Tall People
Don't want no Tall People
Don't want no Tall People
Round here
Tall People are just half as fast
As you and I
All men under 6'0" are brothers
Until the day they die
(It's An Average World)
Tall People got nobody
Tall People got nobody
Tall People got nobody
To love
They bump their heads
on a sign or a door
They have to shop
at the too tall store
They got big SUV's
That go zoom zoom zoom
They got loud voices
Goin' boom boom boom
They die much earlier
they can't accelerate
They're gonna bump their head every time
Well, I don't want no Tall People
Don't want no Tall People
Don't want no Tall People
'Round here
So it's gonna be a lyrical war, eh? Check out this classic from The Muppet Movie.
I Hope That Something Better Comes Along
Rowlf: I finish work, go home, read a book, have a couple of beers, take myself for a walk and go to bed.
Kermit: Nice and simple.
Rowlf: Stay away from women. That's my motto.
Kermit: But I can't.
Rowlf: Neither can I. That's my trouble...
You can't live with 'em, you can't live without 'em.
There's somethin' irresistabullish about 'em.
We grin and bear it 'cause the nights are long.
I hope that somethin' better comes along.
Kermit: (spoken): Yeah, I know what you mean...
It's no good complainin' and pointless to holler.
If she's a beauty she'll get under your collar.
She made a monkey out of old King Kong,
I hope that somethin' better comes along.
Ah, but what could be better than a saucy Irish setter
When puppy love comes on strong?
Or a collie that's classy, a laddie needs a lassie,
A lover and wife gives you a new leash on life.
Kermit: (spoken): Uh, Rowlf, was that a new 'leash' on life?
Rowlf: (spoken): Oh yeah...sorry about that.
I don't mean to scare ya, my friend, but I betcha
Come "Father's Day", the litter bug's gonna getcha;
The urge is righteous, but the face is wrong.
I hope that somethin' better comes along.
Still, it's fun when they're fetching,
And agree to see an etching
That you keep at your lily pad.
There is no solution, it's part of evolution,
Rowlf:
The pitter-patter of soles,
The little feet of tadpoles!
Kermit: (spoken) Ah, Rowlf, tadpoles don't have feet!
Rowlf: (spoken) Oh. Sorry about that.... 2, 3, 4!
There's no limitation to mixin' and matchin'
Some get an itchin' for a critter they've been scratchin'.
A skunk was badgered the results were strong.
I hope that somethin' better,
I hope that somethin' better,
I hope that somethin' better comes along!!!
Rowlf: Beep bop bidder da dum dum bum bum bum!
You are free to fire back, Matthews.
Um, you know, just a friendly reminder, you could do a lot to make this war awesome, Allie. Please. Like, maybe, post something. Offensive. TODAY!!!!
Truce.
I'm too tired to fight. I'm in the middle of the Wars of the Roses, Thirty Years' War, and multiple Catholic vs. Protestant wars already. And the Inquisition.
Think about the INQUISITION.
*dies*
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